There are certain experiences and incidents that we go through as we grow up,
it could be a 5-year-old or 50-year-old incident at this point, but it can
still affect you as an individual and your relationships. One of these factors
could be your childhood, how you were raised, or how you were treated. The way
primary caregivers handle the child reveals much about the youngster and how
they will develop. Although some children are fortunate to enjoy a happy and
healthy upbringing, others are subjected to situations that are harmful to
them. If the person identifies the issues that they are facing due to their
childhood and works to deal with them, then it is a healthy way to deal with
them. If the person is not aware of them, then those unresolved issues may
cause more harm than expected.
Trauma is defined as "an event or series of events that are emotionally
painful or distressful, and that can have lasting negative effects on an
individual’s physical, emotional, social, and cognitive
development”.
Some Common Types Of Childhood Trauma Include:
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Physical abuse: This is any form of physical harm that is
intentionally inflicted on a child, such as hitting, kicking, burning, or
shaking.
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Sexual abuse: This is any form of sexual contact or
behavior that is forced or coerced on a child, or that a child does not
understand or is not able to consent to.
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Emotional abuse: This is any form of non-physical abuse
that is intended to harm a child s emotional well-being, such as
name-calling, threats, or rejection.
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Neglect: This is the failure to provide a child with the
basic necessities of life, such as food, shelter, clothing, medical care, or
emotional support.
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Witnessing violence: This is when a child sees or hears
violence, such as domestic violence, community violence, or war.
Ways Trauma Impacts Relationships
Unresolved trauma can have a profound impact on a person’s development.
A very important aspect of development is the relationships one forms as they
grows, these could be with parents, friends, or other romantic relationships.
Your trauma may influence your relationship in ways that you are not aware of.
While a good and strong upbringing may influence the relationship in a
positive manner, trauma, and unresolved matters can impact your relationships
in other ways, which could include:
-
Trust issues: If you were traumatized as a child, you may
have difficulty trusting others. This can make it difficult to form close
relationships, including romantic relationships. You may worry that your
partner will hurt you or leave you, and you may find it hard to let them in
emotionally.
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Communication problems: Trauma can also affect your
communication skills. You may have difficulty expressing your feelings, or
you may be hypersensitive to criticism. This can lead to misunderstandings
and conflict in your relationships.
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Fear of intimacy: If you experienced physical or sexual
abuse as a child, you may have difficulty with physical intimacy in adult
relationships. You may feel anxious or uncomfortable being close to someone,
or you may have flashbacks or nightmares of the abuse.
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Low self-esteem: Trauma can damage your self-esteem. You
may feel like you re not good enough, or you may have negative beliefs about
yourself. This can make it difficult to maintain healthy relationships.
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Reenactment: If you experienced trauma in your childhood,
you may subconsciously recreate those experiences in your adult
relationships. For example, if you were abused as a child, you may find
yourself in relationships with partners who are abusive.
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Setting boundaries: there are certain boundaries that
everyone should maintain. These boundaries differ based on the individual
and their relationship with the other person. Maintaining and respecting
your own boundaries stops others from overstepping and disrespecting them.
Trauma and its impact on people tend to be serious and can hamper your overall
development in many ways. That impact may be explicit and noticeable by others
or implicit and something that you are dealing with internally. Either way, it
is essential for you to deal with it effectively for your own and others well
being. If you re struggling with the effects of trauma in your relationships,
it s important to seek professional help. A
Therapist can help you understand how your trauma is impacting your
relationships and develop healthy coping mechanisms.